Is he a sleazy cheater?
Why men have workplace affairs
He just called and said he’ll be working late again! Ugh, that’s the third time this week. What could possibly be so important that he is staying until 7 or 8 o’clock or even later every night? Well, I’ve got news for you sister: his tardiness may have little to do with work.
Workplace affairs are nothing new and working late to cheat is probably the number one excuse of all time to get away with cheating. At least in the last 150 years or so anyway. Cheating at the workplace or with people from the workplace is a natural go to for most cheating adults because, well, there are several reasons. Let’s take a look at six of them.
The “Why” of Workplace Cheating
It is the place where he spends nearly as much time as he does at home. When you spend a lot of time in one place or one set of circumstances, familiarity and a certain comfort level can be established. Few other social interactions in adult life offer as much time and consistency to establish familiarity and comfort as the workplace. Familiarity and comfort breed trust, and trust tends to break down some of the normal social barriers and public faces that people employ to make their way through the world. The extent to which this can happen varies depending on the type and nature of the workplace but it does occur on some level in nearly every place of business where employees, affiliates, and business associates regularly interact.
The workplace is likely to be the place where your significant other knows the most members of the opposite sex, which is why cheating at work is one of the most common instances of infidelity. Not only that: it is the place where he knows those members of the opposite sex the best. Opposite sex, familiarity, trust, closeness, falling away of certain barriers, attraction, sexual attraction…you see the progression. And it often happens suddenly, imperceptibly, and strongly. It takes a strong and committed person to deny themselves these “easy opportunities”. Is your man one of them who will cheat on you with a co-worker?
Ego. A man “working late” may very well have started out simply working late. But men who work late are often successful men in the company. Success and power are very attractive qualities in a man. They feed his ego and cause him to exude masculinity and confidence. Women love this and will be attracted. A man who has women coming onto him even on an occasional or semi-regular basis is going to love the ego stroking, and as time goes on his defenses will wear down and he will become more and more likely to act on the whims of his growing ego.
Women are often just as much on the hunt as the man because of their own insecurities, unmet needs, or disappointments in their own relationships or lack of a relationship. So, they make themselves as subtly yet unmistakably available as possible. It is hard for even the most faithful man to stand up to this type of barrage on a daily basis.
It can be just plain easy. The women are already right there, he knows them, he likes them for one reason or another, maybe even admires them and if he is successful and good looking, the women themselves will also be attracted and send increasingly bold signals as time goes by. He doesn’t have to do any extra work like set up an online dating profile, construct new excuses for his absence, or go out and meet new people. They are already served up on a platter.